


The Rise of Kylo Ren

by idrilhadhafang



Series: The Rise of Kylo Ren [1]
Category: Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Ben Solo Needs A Hug, Birthday, Brutality, Canon Compliant, Creepy Snoke (Star Wars), Dreams and Nightmares, Emotional Manipulation, Force Visions, Jedi Ben Solo, Killing, Kylo Ren Backstory, M/M, Pilot Poe Dameron, Pre-Star Wars: The Force Awakens, Some Fluff, Tragedy, Violence, Young Ben Solo, Young Poe Dameron
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-07-20
Updated: 2019-07-27
Packaged: 2020-07-09 11:41:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,041
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19887076
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/idrilhadhafang/pseuds/idrilhadhafang
Summary: In which every evil has an origin story, and Kylo Ren is no exception. Inspired by Charles Soule’s recent announcement.





	1. Waking World

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: I own nothing. 
> 
> Author’s Notes: I wouldn’t normally be beating this dead horse again except Charles Soule announced a The Rise of Kylo Ren comic series and I got really excited.

_The sky was blood red and the trees were burning. Even as the figure in the almost avian mask stalked across the ruins of the landscape, he knew what he had to do. The people in the city were traitors. Complicit. They needed to die._

_“Sir,” the stormtrooper in chrome armor said, “Your orders?”_

_The figure in the avian mask spoke. “Kill them. Kill them all.”_

_And even as the blaster bolts rang out, the figure knew he was righteous. Justified in every action he took —_

— and Ben Solo snapped awake in his bed, shaking and sweating and trying not to scream. 

***

Getting up wasn’t easy. There was still something in Ben that could still feel the remnants of the nightmare all but clinging to his memory. He had to reorient himself to reality, to realize that it was indeed just a dream, nothing more. It wasn’t like he was actually there, in that bizarre landscape with the burning trees and the blood red sky. 

There was his bed. There was his his calligraphy set that Dad had gotten him for his eighteenth Naming Day. And speaking of Naming Days...now he was nineteen years old. The last year of being a teenager. Ben couldn’t help but feel a certain terror at the very thought. Everyone was on their way — and so was he. 

He got up, before getting dressed and brushing his hair, and heading up the path. On the path, he bumped into Poe Dameron and his droid BB-8. 

Poe was someone that he’d known since he first came to the Academy. Ever since Poe had taken pity on a scared young boy looking for his daddy, they had been all but inseparable. Ben had always loved him as one loved an idol, but now he was wondering if his feelings were more than that. Even bumping into Poe made his heart flutter, like he was more a boy of fourteen than someone who was nearly twenty. 

“Hey, Ben!” Poe smiled as he spoke, and kriff, that smile gave Ben that feeling of...mynocks in his stomach? He had always found that expression odd, but it was the truth. It was the best way to describe how the thoughts of the nightmare kind of fled from Ben’s mind. 

Ben smiled, a little shyly. “Hi. Heading out to flight practice?”

”In a bit. You look like hell,” Poe said. “Rough night?”

Ben nodded. 

“No offense. Sorry you had a rough night.”

”None taken. And thanks.” Ben couldn’t help but sense Poe’s own tiredness, the nightmares from his Republic Navy missions that imprinted on his mind gory images that Ben wasn’t about to probe his mind and see. Ben had always had the talent to read minds, but he never got invasive. He doubted he ever could. “Walk with me?”

”Would be wonderful.” Poe said. 

They walked up the path, BB-8 rolling behind them as they talked, and there was something about Poe’s company that was a comfort — something Ben had always felt, but never as intensely. Maybe it was the nightmares, but Ben had found himself getting lost in Poe’s eyes more than once. Lost in his laugh, in the way he spoke, in his smile. In his voice. 

Finally, they reached the Academy, and Poe squeezed his shoulder. A gesture that made Ben’s heart skip a beat. “Happy Naming Day, by the way,” Poe said. “You’ll do great. Trust me.”

Ben smiled. “Thanks. You too.”

He headed into the Academy and sat with his friends from the Academy, Mike and Kara. Talking with them made him feel better. Somewhat. 

Breakfast ended, and Ben’s job in the Archives was beginning. He helped out with texts and relics that his uncle had found in his travels, and he could safely say he liked his job. He liked being around his uncle, and he liked learning more about Jedi history. The Voice would have scoffed at the idea. But Ben found that he liked it. Just about all of it. 

***

”Ben, be helpful and carry this for me?” his uncle said, hoisting a particularly heavy text that he had recovered from his travels as he spoke. Ben took it from his uncle’s arms and put it on the shelf. It was huge. Ben absently wondered what was in it to warrant so many pages. 

His uncle sighed in relief. “Thanks. It’s...a lot of books.”

”No kidding,” Ben said. “Are you okay, Uncle? You seem a little...” 

He trailed off. It was probably none of his business. 

His uncle sighed. “I’m fine, Ben. Just a bit exhausted.”

It was more than that. “You’re frustrated.”

” ‘Course I am. I’m not exactly the young man I used to be.”

”No, I mean with the Order,” Ben said. 

Luke sighed. “Just be careful with your gifts, Ben. Not everyone’s fond of having their thoughts read.”

”Yeah, I figured as much,” Ben said. "Do you want to talk about it?”

Luke sighed. “You’re young, Ben. Today’s all about you. I don’t want to spoil your Naming Day.”

Ben nodded. Maybe it was best not to pick at a scab that was just healing. Still, he wondered if his uncle was starting to become disillusioned with the Jedi. Ben supposed he couldn’t blame him. After all, the Voice had pointed out many things about the Jedi that, honestly, made no sense. 

He wished there was something he could do to help his uncle. Then again, Ben thought, he could barely help himself. 

***

His nephew left for the day with his job in the archives, and Luke couldn’t help but feel a stab of melancholy. Maybe it was a remnant of being away looking for Jedi relics; there was something about coming home that really was all the sweeter. 

Ben...he wasn’t going to lie, he was worried about Ben. There were flashes of darkness in him. Goodness and decency overall, but a coil of darkness winding through him. Luke had sensed that baby Ben had a potential for both good and evil and he had been afraid — but now, he supposed, he didn’t need to worry. Vader had had more darkness than him than Ben ever could, and he had done the right thing in the end. 

And as Master Zhar had said, those on the Dark path weren’t lost forever. It was a comfort, Luke thought, and perhaps one of the things he could hold onto from the Jedi teachings. The rest, like stealing younglings from their families, forbidding attachment — all of it had seemed so cultlike. Not to mention not caring about instances like slavery on Tatooine...

Luke ran a hand through his hair, which had darkened from the healthy blond it had been to a darker shade. Maybe he was getting older. More cynical. He was at least middle-aged now, and it probably showed. He almost envied his nephew’s more naive nature. 

Taking out one of the smaller texts, Luke began to read. It was an account of a battle of the Clone Wars. (Basic slavery too; did the Jedi not consider that they were all but enlisting slaves to fight their battles?) There was something to be said about learning from history, he supposed...


	2. No Virtue In The Ordinary

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben celebrates his Naming Day. Snoke is creepy. The two are unfortunately related.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: I own nothing. 
> 
> Author’s Notes: CW for Snoke being Snoke.

Heading down the path with Poe was comforting, and Ben had to admit he was relieved. He loved his uncle, liked his job in the archives, but he wouldn’t deny that it was tiring as hell. Besides, walking down the path with Poe...well, he’d be lying if he said that it didn’t get his heart skipping a beat. 

“How was your day?” Poe said. BB-8 wheeled along cheerfully behind them, and Ben felt a tug of affection for the little droid. 

Ben sighed. “The usual.” He didn’t mention his worry for his uncle. The feelings of frustration and growing pessimism that he had seen in his uncle’s head. Whatever he was finding out probably wasn’t pleasant, Ben could imagine. 

Poe frowned. “You look a little troubled.”

”Just worried about my uncle. He’s...” Ben sighed. “It’s complicated.” How did he explain that the renowned Luke Skywalker was having doubts? Uncle Luke was apparently more optimistic when he was younger; he was apparently almost iconic for it. 

“Jedi stuff?” Poe said. 

Ben nodded. “You could say that. Not all of the Jedi did things I agree with.”

”Well, I can imagine. Even the Republic’s past hasn’t been spotless.”

Ben sighed. “Guess history’s like that. How’s flight practice?”

”Getting better. Truth is, I miss home. I miss you too.”

Even if Poe meant it in the platonic sense, it still made Ben’s heart skip a beat. 

“Yeah,” he said, his mouth a bit dry. “I miss you too, Poe.”

”Yeah. Y’know...the day’s not over. Maybe you could come over and we can celebrate your Naming Day proper?”

”I’d love to,” Ben said. Now his heart was pounding frantically in his chest. “With you.”

Poe grinned. “Let’s get to it, then!”

***

The guests took time to arrive, but it was worth it when they did. 

Dinner was good. After listening to the others sing “Happy Naming Day” and having cake with Yavin fruit in it, Ben got to opening presents with Kes, Poe, his uncle, his father and his mother (who had arrived late and apologized for it). Mike and Kara too. After opening gift after gift, old texts on Alderaan from his mother, lightsaber upgrades from his uncle, a flight simulator game from his father, a Yavin recipe book from Kes, texts on Old Republic history from Kara and a book to sketch in from Mike...

Ben opened Poe’s gift. It was a model X-wing kit. Even looking at it, at the model parts, Ben couldn’t help but grin at Poe. 

“Thank you,” he said, turning to the others. “All of you.” 

“Not a problem, kid,” Han said. 

***

It was when he got back to his hut, his presents all but the spoils of victory, that Ben was already feeling strangely empty and lonely. It was something that he dreaded, if only because he’d have to deal with the aftermath of the voice in his head afterwards. 

_Happy Naming Day, young Solo,_ the Voice rumbled in his mind. 

“Leave me be,” Ben muttered. 

_You should be a Knight by now. Your uncle’s holding you back, isn’t he? Restricting you. Talking about your raw strength until you’re sick of it, but never truly allowing you to prove yourself..._

Ben couldn’t deny it. He could still remember anxious discussions between his parents in hushed voices about his abilities. The way his uncle feared for him. He’d been sick of it. Couldn’t someone simply treat him as Ben, and not Ben Solo, the boy who could either be the galaxy’s savior or its destroyer? Maybe he just wanted to be ordinary, just for a while. 

_Ordinary has no virtue, child. Only being remembered._

_Sit up, young Solo. Close your eyes, open your mind. Think of the fires ravaging the battlefields in your nightmares...and go deeper..._


	3. Facets

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ben deals with a bully, and Snoke is still a creep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: I own nothing.

The bedsheets were all but scorched even as Ben tossed them. Whatever the Voice had taught him (he knew that his eyes had been closed, and there was some sort of energy shooting from his palms, and...the bedsheets were all but scorched) had been powerful. He knew that much. Tossing away the scorched remains (washing them would probably do no good) was all but a shock. Had _he_ done this? Did he really have that much potential built up in his body?

 _You are strong indeed, young Solo,_ the Voice rumbled.

”Thanks...I suppose.” A beat. “How did I do that?”

_Nothing’s impossible with the Force. Even pulling apart buildings and projecting yourself across galaxies...the Force’s possibilities are endless, Light and Dark alike. And perhaps even beyond it. All Skywalker sees is restraint, but he sees only a facet of a larger jewel._

_“_ But I couldn’t even master a lightsaber at fourteen.”

_It’s what you represent. The battleground. The aligning of elements. My previous apprentices could hardly master even that. But you..._

Ben couldn’t help but feel a certain sort of pride. “Thank you,” he said.

_Never underestimate your worth, young Solo. At least to me._

***

Sleep had been uncomfortable. After spending most of the night shivering and trying to get warm, Ben had fallen into an uneasy sleep, and when he’d woken up, he’d been tired. Beyond tired, actually. Even getting dressed for the day, he was all but worn out. Which made it all the easier to fumble during his lightsaber training, and have Zeck Mills ridicule him.

”Where did you learn to duel?” Zeck said. “Honestly. A drunken tach with one leg could duel better than you!”

Ben’s pride was already pretty badly battered in that moment. “Kriff off.”

”Honestly, Solo, you’re just a fraud with a lightsaber,” Zeck said. “No wonder your uncle puts you on library duty — you’re not good at anything else. And it’s not like anyone but those losers Mike and Kara like you.”

Ben could swear that red was rising behind his eyes. 

_Kill him,_ the Voice hissed in his mind, but as quickly as it came, it went, and Ben realized Zeck was still there. Very much unharmed.

He didn’t think “Thank the Force” would come to mind, but it did.

***

By the time that Ben headed back down the path, he was already angry. Angry and humiliated, actually. What exactly Zeck said was enough to sting. You’re just a fraud who can’t even wield a lightsaber right, indeed. There was something about even that that hit closer to home than he would have liked. 

_A pity you didn’t electrocute him,_ the Voice said. _He never would have doubted you then..._

Ben couldn’t help but freeze. Electrocute Zeck? Yes, the older man made him angry, but torturing him? He had heard stories about how the Emperor had tortured Uncle Luke and had been horrified — even though he’d known Vader had ultimately saved him. 

Why had Vader saved Uncle Luke anyway? And why did Uncle Luke get that occasional smile tugging at the corners of his lips talking about someone so evil? Ben could only assume that Vader had been important to his Uncle, though why someone so despicable as Vader would be important to anyone...

Then again, there was something about Vader that had struck a bizarre awe in him. Tall, masked, menacing, a creature of extraordinary grace and poise. Terror shouldn’t have seemed so awe-inspiring, but there it was. Ben had only seen holos in the Archives, but even so...

It was bumping into Poe on the way back down the path that Ben saw the look of concern on his face. More than that, worry. It was the sort of look that suggested that Poe was wondering if Ben was about to explode at any minute. Come apart.

”You okay, Ben?” Poe said. 

Ben nodded. “Why...do I look weird or something?”

”You look like something’s bothering you.”

”It’s...” And even talking about Zeck, Ben couldn’t help but feel the old anger creeping back in. “I don’t even want to hurt him,” Ben said, “I just want to prove him wrong. I’m not a fraud with a lightsaber.”

”I know,” Poe said, gently. “Honestly, Zeck’s just a...Sithspawn.” It was clear he wanted to say something more caustic. 

Ben’s lips twitched. “Thanks.” He sighed. “Y’know, you can swear in front of me. I’m not a kid anymore. Just saying.”

Poe smiled. “Honestly, I know. I just couldn’t find a name that summed him up well enough.”

Ben couldn’t help but smile for real this time. “You...always know how to make me feel better, right? Even when I’m down.”

”What are friends for?” Poe said.

For some reason, Ben couldn’t help but feel a hollowness in the pit of his stomach. Like he wasn’t quite happy with the word “friends”. “Yeah,” he said. “Exactly.”

***

_He would hate you if he knew._

That was what the Voice said even as Ben sat at the table, practicing calligraphy. He was already reluctant to fall asleep, if he was to be honest.

”Poe doesn’t have a hateful bone in his body,” Ben said.

_Not by any fault of his own, of course. He would hate you if only because his parents taught him such things. Because his friends taught him such things. We’re considered evil for the choices we make. “Dark Side” is a label, yes, but it’s not all we are. It’s not all we believe. There are things beyond the Light, beyond the Dark — this is all we encompass, all we believe. I have seen things that you wouldn’t believe...but Dameron would only see a conquering tyrant, a monstrous beast._

“Who are you?”

Silence. Then, _I am a being beyond the Dark Side or the Light, young Solo. I prefer to think of myself as a leader, a father, a teacher. Your uncle’s views are only a sliver of a greater whole._

“There’s more than Light and Dark?” Ben could not help but be awed.

_Naturally. I am an old man, young Solo — I have seen the rise and the fall of the Galactic Empire, I have seen the rise and fall of the Republic, I have seen my apprentices promise me greatness and then leave me with nothing. Light, Dark, Sith, Jedi — they are but a snippet of what the Force can do. Your uncle seeks to keep you bound by withholding that information from you._

”My uncle wouldn’t do that; he’s a good man.”

_It’s easy to say that about your kin, is it not? But he is afraid of you, child. Not as blatantly as your mother, but afraid nonetheless._

”He...” Was it true? His parents had had hushed discussions about him before where it was all too clear they were frightened of him, whether he’d accidentally caused a light to flicker out in a moment of strong emotion, or something else. And Uncle Luke was never cruel to him, but —

_You’re unwanted. That’s obvious. But not to me._

No. Not to the Voice.

But his parents...

Even going to sleep, Ben couldn’t help but feel like he was drowning in a series of confused thoughts and only, barely, treading water.


End file.
